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#spammers named and shamed!

Are you spamming?

Is spamming and promoting becoming one and the same?

Know this: You are wasting your own time and others and you are not achieving anything.

The internet has opened up a world of connection and enables you to show someone on the other side of the world what you are doing which is utterly fabulous, but have you considered whether they actually want to know?

When I was ‘learning the ropes’ on Twitter I got told off for shamelessly promoting my book; “hello! read my new book at ……..” It got no attention (apart from someone telling me off), no retweets or mentions. I tweeted about an issue in the book and that was a different story.

Mashable recently reported that social media spam increased 355% in the just the first half of 2013, it’s getting out of control and we have to put a stop to it! So, to get to the root of the problem, I thought it might be helpful to offer up a list of what is considered spam, in my opinion and what is not.  Here’s what I got in just a day and my interpretation…

1. Facebook: “XXXXX link. Listen to my new track, hope you like it” equivalent to sending a tape into Sony in the 80s – it will maybe make it to the right desk then collect dust.

2. Twitter: “DM: Hi thanks for the follow, now find me on Facebook!”:  Why? Lack of personality, generic and no effort needed to send that one! I won’t bother.

3.: Email: From”The XXX is out! October Edition” A time saving tool, yes,  but completely defeats the object of content sharing/marketing and building relations. I’ve used this myself in the past out of curiosity, but times up. We don’t want an automatic information collecting machine. It needs to be streamlined and personal to promote conversation. Ask yourself, does anyone actually get in touch with me about it? I very much doubt it.

4. Website: Comment “I am fat man”.  (Yes. Really)

5. WhatsApp: “My video is now live, watch here!”. Very unlikely unless it was from Prince. That’s unlikely too. Who are you and how did you get my contact number?

6. Twitter: “You must see this link..XXXX” – Must I? Is it going to change my life? Possibly should have told me why to be in with a chance of a click through. Delete.

7. Twitter: “Watching your calories? Avoid these drinks like the plague XXX”. No I’m not on a diet and if I was, I still wouldn’t like to receive a text reminding me that I am.

8: Linkedin: “Please check out my new single released soon.” Linkedin is not the arena for promoting your latest track nor is that the way to do it!

9. Linkedin: “Opportunity for you, this is worth taking a look at”. I don’t know you, so why would you assume that I would be interested in something you have proposed?

Can you hear the antagonistic, slightly defensive attitude creeping in? I digress…

10. Linkedin: Message with heading “Panache and Coolness”. Instant deletion.

11. Website: “Don’t be harsh on yourself if you still catch yourself binge eating”. a) I don’t and won’t. b) if binge eaters are your target audience and you need to grab their attention, don’t you think you should offer something a little more sensitive?

12. Facebook: “X invited you to play X”…Aghhhhhh! One of my personal pet hates. I will never play a game on Facebook or online. Ever. Fact.

13. Email: ” My Dear Friend…” Stop. You are neither a dear friend, or even a friend for that matter. Over familiarity is a no no and no matter how polite and humble you are, your spam still has the same affect on me and everyone else, as someone who was completely rude!

14. Email: “Have you been injured? Claim your Compensation Today!”. If I had been injured and there was a chance of receiving compensation, I would contact you (or someone else probably) myself. You have just lost a potential future customer. Not gained one. Consider your wide varied audience, think out of the box or leverage your services with someone else. Above all, stop direct selling.

15. Email: “This Summer, The New MINI Offer – Request your Brochure or Test Drive one today”:  I have unsubscribed from you 3 times. The top of your email marketing campaign says ‘It’s Summer?. No, it’s October. Stop spamming me, I don’t have or want a car and you are giving MINI a bad name.


16: Email: “Transform your patio with this fabulous garden furniture set”. It’s Autumn and therefore it’s unlikely I will be wanting to buy garden furniture (unless there’s a huge saving of course!). Perhaps this should have been put out in April or May?

17. Website Comment: “Keepin your home quiet (as mmuch aas possible)…” SPELLCHEEEECK


Ok – some may genuinely want to ‘promote’ their new single, product or service, but this is not the way forward. Educate yourselves in the art of promotion and the ‘new marketing’. Know your target market, research them and understand them.  Then get to know them. Introduce yourself, comment on something they have commented on, give them a compliment, tell them you don’t agree with something they have said….anything! but start a relationship.I think I’ll leave it there. I just can’t bear to give it any more time, energy or attention but I list in the hope that you spammers will read this and change your ways!

My parting comment to you spammers…..If you are honestly trying to engage a specific audience, then learn social etiquette and the art of conversation.

I’d like to hear your thoughts on spam and spammers. What’s the worst, funniest, offensive spam you have received? What do you think the future of spamming is?

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